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not long out of school
in my parents home
he entered my bedroom
to hand me my phone
his face opened wide
to see my fingers inside
fingering and fucking
I continued at will
as he tried to push in
and join in the fun
unable to reach me
to be together as one

furiously now
picking up speed
wrestling with my juice hole
fulfilling that need
to let it all out
to open even wider
my throbbing bursting snatch
as hungry as can be
like a kid without a toy
he sat quietly
beside me

the bed head shook
scratching paint from my wall
paintings leaned over
the glass began to fall
my face burnt red
moaning and wet
ripping open my buttons
to devour my breast
on and on
unable to rest
squirting
splashing
peeing in between
as he lowered his head
not wanting to be seen
like a little boy lost
my scared and lonely teen

on a sea of hormones
in a world of doubt
did I reject him
did I shut him out
he needed a friend
a lover in me
selfish little Sasha
as cruel as can be

my parents have moved on now
the bed now sits alone
her iron posts have rusted
no one lives at home
except the ghost of my best friend
saying Sasha let me in
I’d trade all the other moments
to have him back again